i feel sad and i kow its my own fault
at least i can just allow myself to feel sad and i
dont have to fight it at leasat i can just
allow it at last i can just allow it
i wish i felt good i wish i felt heppy i wish i wasn’t attached
i wish i didnt care i wish i didnt care i wishe i didnt care i wishe
i could have fun i wish ididnt care iwishe i didnt ccare i hate
that i care i hate that i let myself i hate myaking someint
out of nthing
nothing knowing im mamking something out os
of nothing at
least i can always talk to god i can always come here and talk to god
and god loves me and understands me
god knows what im going through because its its fault!!
THANKS GOD FOR NOTHING
oh you mean putting exactly what you wanted right in front of you
because you wanted to feel this way you wanted someone to love
tou watned to love someone you couldnt have you wanted it and i gave it to you
and no you’re mad at me!
i’m mad i’m o mad i care i’m so mad i care
im so mad
i let it get to me not that i even let it i ust does
and it makes me so mad
that one th
little thing what that idn’t even a thing that i made a thing
i kno it started with thet
the message and the the message again
and
im tired of living like this
i want to punish others for the way i feel
i want to remove myself
so i dont have to feel pain i want to never see her again
so i dont hae to
feel the pain of missing her i just want it done
and then ill never have to miss her again
and i can go back to my normal life
wher ei wish we had someone to love together
im sad because its not what i want it bo
to be because im saying no to life
im sad becase seh didnt hug me right
not the way i felt i deserved
the way i wanted to but i have to admit
its just not like that i need to admit
its just not like that i
i need to let it go forever
i can just focus on god and ill be ok
ill get through today all i ahve to
do is get through today
all i have to do is gt through right now
all i can do is
be here now that’s all i can
that’s all i can do that’s all i can d
that’s a
all i can do that’s all i can is
get through this now and then this one
i cn do it
i can do it i can get through it i get
get through it
tomorrow is a new moment
im brateful
graetfult o let it go to just be
to release
grateful for the release
grateful for the release
i have to let it go i have to
let it go i have to
i can’t believe i care
i know when i left integrity
i cant believe it was just one
little thing like that can send me sprialing
and im really disappointed in myself
that tha it
that is the case and it makes me want to just
give up it makes me not want to be around anyone
because of how sensitive i am and it makes
me wnat to just sit in the house do
so i dont get hurt
so i dont hurt myself so i dont hurt myself
it makes me want to protect myself
it makes me so so sad
all ica n do i get through this one moment
be ok in this one moment all ica nd o
is be okeay
in this moment let it go in this one moment
let it go in this one moment
i awnt to hurt her becaause she hurts me
and she doesnt even know what dhe does
but she hurts me
just be existing she hurts me
she breaks my herat just by existing
so i want to break hers so she can hurt too
because she makes me hurt
and its not fair