excited to redevote myself to god

excited for a turning point in my life
for the contrast to
have pushed me so far

that i have no choice but to turn
within to turn toward god to turn
toward what i know and

i am devoted to

i feel good i feel good i feel good
and i know i don’t have to wonder i know
that the work

this work helps me
be ok with life no matter what happens
i can be ok with life no matter what

happens i can be ok with whatever happens
i love that i get to choose i love feeling

empowered by me i love feeling empowered by this day
i love feeling good in this day i love

feeling good in this day
i love feeling empowered by life doing the work

knowing it’s already cleaned up
and i

keep picturing
my brother

dying in that hospital bed
and i can’t get the image out of my head
that he actually died

right there
i can’t believe it
i just can’t believe it’s gone

and i keep

conjuring up that image for some reason

i keep going back to it
like i want to see it
i want to see it but i odn’t

don’t know why

i guess to honor him
to not forget
what he went through

to tell him i love him
i guess just to see him
because i miss him
and i can’t believe he’s gone
i can’t believe he died in front
of all of us

but i’m glad we were there
i’m glad we made it i ‘m glad
we made it in time

but i wish i would have gotten to say goodbye

but i’m kind of glad i didn’t see him
didn’t get to talk to him
didn’t have to see him

alive and then dead
in the same day

i’m grateful for a new outlook on life
for the contrast

that helps me focus
that helps me make my life new

i’m grateful for the contrast that helps me
for the connection with god
to know that nothing matters and it’s all just

for fun anyway

it feels good to know this it feels good to know it
feels good to do this work

when the contrast finally gets bad enough
that is when people turn within
and i know that i can use this

as a turning point in my life
i can use this contrast

to live my best life to
be grateful to be alive
and to

seize each day it feels good to
feel good in my life to celebrate the day

and make the choice to
be happy regardless of circumstances
and to love

regardless of
condition

it feels so good to make the choice to
do that it feels good to love
to make the choice to love for me

it feels good to be bakc
and connected with spirit
with the knowledge of life

it feels good to be back

connected to source

i feel the pain i feel the pain
and i am moving through it

i’m not forcing it down

i feel it i feel the pain

of my brother dying so young
the pain my parents must be feeling

the loss the
emptiness

the pain of missing him
the pain of being reminded of him

the pain that he’s not there
to reach out to anymore

the guilt of being relieved
that we aren’t going through that anymore

relieved he isn’t suffering anymore
and feeling guilty for that

i feel the pain of feeling guilty that
i didn’t do more to help him
even though i know i tried my best

there is still pain in knowing i could
have done more

feeling my way through that pain
and knowing that i can’t change the past
feeling the pain
my other brothers must be feeling

feeling the pain of dreading his
service

and through feeling that pain
i can work through it i can work through it

i am so grateful i have the tools i am so
grateful i have the tools to

cope with grief
pain despair

and i’m so grateful that i know i can
use this as a trning

turning mpint
point in my life

as the contrast pushes me toward

what i have been wanting for a long time

a reconnectoin with
with self
and when i choose to

turn toward god to feel the
god energy flowing through me

when i make the choice to do that

then i can feel

the same

no matter what
no fear no dread no regret

just the same
the same as god
and knowing that my existence doesn’t matter
and there’ snot

no reason to cling

to life
to what is

to anything i think should be
a certain way

i feel excited about this new phase of
my life feel excited to be back to god
back to self

devoted to the vortex
devoted to the work of spirit

because i want to
because i want to live

a spirit filled life
i want to live my best life
i want to live my
best life

and i know that this contrast is
helping me do that
so for that i am

grateful

i’m so grateful i have a good live
so grateufl life is
working out for me so grateufl iknow

so grateful i get to choose i get to
choose life in this here and now i get to
choose my best life in this here and now
i get ot feel good

i get to feel good i get to feel good i get to feel good
i get to feel
good i get to feel the feeling of me
i get ot feel
to feel god to know that i am god
that i am

the creator i know that i am the creator
i know that i am the creator and i never have to wonder
i can just relax into the flow of life
i can turn mmy att

attention toward what i want